Look Ma, I'm a Writer!

And God commissioned
a computer program to be made,
one that could see
the entire Earth.
And a programmer created it,
and called it Google Earth.
And it was presented to God
for beta testing.
He checked all the lands of the planet Earth,
and was pleased.
Then he checked
the waters of the Earth,
and saw something which disturbed him.
So God asked,
"What are those white things
scattered across the surface of the sea?
It seems the people have been polluting my oceans
with their trash."
The programmer answered,
"You can zoom in closer
and check, my Lord."
And God zoomed in,
and laughed.
"My bad," God said.
"It's just the waves."



*Batanes, 5 Feb 2012

I considered myself
a mountain of a man,
towering a head and a shoulder
above everyone else.
My gigantic build
was enhanced by
my arrogance,
which made people tremble
at the sight of me,
which in turn made me think that
I was invincible.

That is,
until I entered
Your House.

I had no need to crouch
(as I am used to)
while entering your doorway,
for even with my arms outstretched,
my fingers could not touch the top of the arch.
Inside, it seemed
that Your halls were made for giants,
for the ceiling stretched to such a height
that could kill a man when dropped from it.
And the music,
oh the music!
pounding, incessant,
seemingly discordant notes
which might have been music
to giant ears,
but which to me
sounded like music
inside the head of a madman.

And then I fell to my knees
and wept
like a child
who lost all his candy
to a bully.
I have been reduced
to sniveling snot
and I got up
and ran away from there
fast as I could,
even before having
laid my eyes
on You.


*Manila Cathedral, May 2011

In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritu Sancti. Amen.

O Lord, under Thy perpetual light do we isolate ourselves
Behind walls of stone do we seek guidance.
Grant us Maximum Silence
That we may be guided by the Holy Spirit
To see who among us rests in Your favor.
Through Jesus Christ our Lord
Host of hosts
Server of servers
May we break through the firewall and connect


              CONNECTION ESTABLISHED…YOU ARE NOW ONLINE…
              NAME? Cardinale Iñigo Benucci PASSWORD? * * * * *
              REQUEST TYPE (PHYSICAL/MENTAL/SPIRITUAL)? spiritual.
              ENTER REQUEST: delete sins.
              …PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE CHECK YOUR SINBOX…
              YOU HAVE ONE (1) SIN. delete all.
              ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DELETE ALL SINS? yes.
              YOUR SINBOX IS EMPTY. new>request
              REQUEST TYPE (PHYSICAL/MENTAL/SPIRITUAL)? mental.
              ENTER REQUEST: clarity of mind.
              …PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE IDENTIFY THE CLUTTER…
              FOUR (4) FACTORS IDENTIFIED. list.
              FAVORITISM//FATIGUE//FRIENDSHIP//FEALTY. clear all.
              ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO CLEAR YOUR MIND? yes.
              …PLEASE WAIT WHILE WE CLEAR YOUR MIND…
              YOU ARE NOW ENLIGHTENED.


May the Lord guide my hand
As I choose who among us shall lead the Flock
That they may not stray far from Your holy light.
May Christ guide my conscience
Knowing I have chosen right
Even if I have chosen
Myself.

Amen.


*Requiescat in Pace, Karol Wojtyla a.k.a. Pope John Paul II
circa Apr 2005

I remember
her eyes:
sincere, yet deceptive,
intense, but far away;
her mouth:
spins sugar over words that
roll over her serpentine tongue.

She has a face that could launch a thousand armies
and that could sink a million ships.

And her body --
perfection incarnate.
Her skin radiates an unholy light,
every inch of her a testament
to the glory of a higher power.

She was the light that struck me blind.

The veil of darkness has been lifted.
Now I am enlightened.

I am the Shepherd
and this is My flock.
The coolest flock of sheep
in the universe.

These sheep answer to Me
and only to Me.
They do not run from
the sound of My voice
nor do they shy away from
the touch of My hand.

Their pen has been equipped
with high-definition CCTV surveillance cameras
and is surrounded by a
high-voltage perimeter barb-wire fence,
while I carry
a sniper rifle (with laser-sight
and night-vision technology) with Me
wherever I go.

And should any one of them
accidentally stray into the badlands,
a full rescue squad is sent
to retrieve them immediately.

But it has come to my attention
that one of you is a spy.
You are not really a sheep
but a wolf disguised as one.

As you all know, anyone caught
impersonating a sheep
shall be executed on the spot.

His name shall be erased from the halls of Valhalla,
his soul shall burn in the fires of Hades,
and his carcass shall be cast down from the top of Mt. Zion.

For whosoever messes with My flock
messes with Me
and I will strike you down
until you cease to exist.


*circa June 2004