Psalm 420

I am the Shepherd
and this is My flock.
The coolest flock of sheep
in the universe.

These sheep answer to Me
and only to Me.
They do not run from
the sound of My voice
nor do they shy away from
the touch of My hand.

Their pen has been equipped
with high-definition CCTV surveillance cameras
and is surrounded by a
high-voltage perimeter barb-wire fence,
while I carry
a sniper rifle (with laser-sight
and night-vision technology) with Me
wherever I go.

And should any one of them
accidentally stray into the badlands,
a full rescue squad is sent
to retrieve them immediately.

But it has come to my attention
that one of you is a spy.
You are not really a sheep
but a wolf disguised as one.

As you all know, anyone caught
impersonating a sheep
shall be executed on the spot.

His name shall be erased from the halls of Valhalla,
his soul shall burn in the fires of Hades,
and his carcass shall be cast down from the top of Mt. Zion.

For whosoever messes with My flock
messes with Me
and I will strike you down
until you cease to exist.


*circa June 2004